Trusting people now is no less of a task for many people out there. Well, did you know this fear of trusting people could end up leading to pistanthrophobia? A new term but an old fear, here’s The Pioneer’s Tejal Sinha bringing to you a detailed analysis, bringing together
all the answers for the same.
Tejal Sinha
Messy breakups don’t simply leave us with a sick sensation in our stomachs whenever we hear our ex’s name. They also leave us scarred and afraid of our future relationships.
You might be over your ex, but that doesn’t imply you’re over what happened. Being lied to, cheated on, and betrayed might make us wary of trusting others.
We all want to be trusted, and we all want to trust our loved ones, because broken trust can only bring betrayal and broken hope. When your trust is shattered and you are left behind and betrayed, it might make you apprehensive about trusting people.After all, if you’ve been burned by fire once, you’ll be more cautious in the future, right? If left untreated, this wariness might develop into a dread of trust, also known as Pistanthrophobia.
Pistanthrophobia is the fear of trusting others, which is frequently the outcome of a major letdown or traumatic breakup in a previous relationship. Mental health professional and relationship expert Aayushi Sharma claims that, as a result of the trauma, the person with this phobia is afraid of being wounded again and avoids being in another relationship in order to avoid future painful experiences.
However, avoiding relationships prevents you from enjoying the beneficial sides of them.
When this happens, Aayushi explains, “One is unable to have a future connection that will assist you gain perspective or knowledge as to why the previous relationship was not a good fit in the first place.
Many people have had a bad experience with a previous relationship in which they felt extremely hurt, betrayed, or rejected. As a result, they live in fear of having a similar experience, which pushes them to shun any relationships.”
Further Sanya Kataria, clinical psychologist at Lissun breaks down the impact of Pistanthrophobia on an individual:
Fear of betrayal:
Individuals with trust issues may have a heightened fear of being hurt, deceived, or taken advantage of by others. This fear can make them guarded, suspicious, and overly cautious in their interactions, making it difficult for them to let others in emotionally.
Emotional dysregulation: Trust issues can lead to emotional detachment as individuals try to protect themselves from potential harm. They may keep others at a distance, avoiding vulnerability and suppressing their emotions. This emotional detachment can hinder the development of deep emotional connections and result in difficulties expressing or receiving love and affection.
Impaired self-esteem and self-worth: Trust issues can erode an individual’s self-esteem and self-worth. They may internalize the belief that they are unworthy of trust or that others will inevitably let them down. This negative self-perception can affect various aspects of their lives, including their confidence, decision-making, and ability to pursue personal goals.
Difficulty in teamwork and collaboration:
Trust is crucial in professional settings as well. Individuals with trust issues may struggle to work effectively in teams or collaborate with others. Their scepticism and fear of being undermined or betrayed can hinder their ability to delegate tasks, rely on others, and build productive working relationships.
Heightened stress and anxiety:
Maintaining a constant state of mistrust and suspicion can be emotionally draining. Individuals with trust issues may experience heightened stress and anxiety in social situations, anticipating negative outcomes or assuming the worst intentions from others. This chronic anxiety can impact their overall well-being and contribute to a negative cycle of reinforcing their trust issues.
“Past experiences of betrayal, deception, or trauma can significantly impact an individual’s ability to trust others. If someone has been hurt or let down in the past, they may develop a fear of being vulnerable and may find it difficult to trust new people. The current generation has grown up in an era of rapid technological advancements, where information is readily accessible. While this has many benefits, it also means they are constantly exposed to news about scams, frauds, and breaches of trust. This constant exposure to negative information can contribute to a general sense of mistrust,” highlights Sanya.
Apart from previous betrayals and high exposure on information, a few other factors that could make it difficult for people especially the current generation to trust people include:
Changing social dynamics:
Social dynamics have evolved with the rise of social media and online interactions. This can create a sense of disconnection and superficiality in relationships. The ability to curate one’s online presence and the prevalence of online scams or deceptive behaviours can lead individuals to approach relationships with caution.
Fear of judgment and rejection:
Many people fear being judged or rejected by others. This fear can make it difficult to trust others, as they may worry about being perceived negatively
Faching social conseuqences:
This fear of judgment can be especially pronounced in the current generation due to the emphasis on social media presence and online validation.
Cultural and societal influences:
Cultural and societal factors can also impact people’s trust levels. Factors such as political instability, social inequality, or experiences of systemic discrimination can contribute to a general sense of mistrust towards institutions or authority figures.
Tips to help overcome the fear of trusting people Understand the root cause:
Work with a therapist or counsellor to explore the underlying reasons for your fear of trusting others. This could involve examining past experiences, childhood attachments, or any specific events that may have contributed to your fear. Understanding the root cause can provide insights and help guide the healing process.
Challenge negative beliefs:
Identify and challenge any negative beliefs you hold about trust and people. Reflect on whether these beliefs are based on evidence or if they are influenced by fear and past experiences. Replace negative beliefs with more balanced and realistic thoughts about trust and the intentions of others.
Start with small steps:
Gradually build trust by starting with small, low-risk interactions. Choose individuals whom you feel relatively comfortable with and slowly increase the level of trust over time. This could involve sharing small personal details, seeking support, or relying on others for assistance in non-threatening situations.
Practice vulnerability:
Allow yourself to be vulnerable in appropriate situations. Share your thoughts, feelings, and concerns with someone you trust. While it can be challenging, opening up and expressing your emotions can help build trust and deepen connections with others.
Develop healthy boundaries:
Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries is essential when learning to trust others. Clearly communicate your boundaries and expectations in relationships. Learning to say “no” when necessary and recognizing your limits will help create a sense of safety and control.
Seek support:
Consider working with a therapist or counsellor who specializes in trust-related issues. They can provide guidance, support, and specific techniques to help you overcome your fear of trusting others. Therapy can offer a safe space to process emotions, explore underlying issues, and develop coping strategies.
Practice self-care:
Engage in activities that promote self-care and self-compassion. Prioritize your physical and emotional well-being by getting enough rest, eating well, engaging in exercise, and pursuing hobbies that bring you joy. Taking care of yourself will strengthen your overall resilience and ability to navigate trust-related challenges. Remember, overcoming the fear of trusting others takes time and patience. Be gentle with yourself throughout the process and celebrate even small victories along the way.
